How to Improve Your Wellbeing With Relator®

Below are audio and video plus a transcript of the conversation, including time stamps.

Your CliftonStrengths^® can empower the 5 elements of your wellbeing -- career, social, financial, community and physical. But how does this happen if you are struggling in one or more of these elements? If you have Relator, Appendix 1 of Gallup's Wellbeing at Work book has Strengths Insights and Action Items that can move you from struggling to thriving as you apply your Relator talent to fuel your wellbeing. Join Jaclynn Robinson and Jim Collison on this CliftonStrengths Podcast to discover how.

The authenticity and investment you put forth in relationships can draw people to you. Knowing they have a friend or colleague in you that seeks to see them for who they truly are fills their wellbeing cup.

Jaclynn Robinson, 1:32

When coaching this person to get involved in a community, encourage them to bring a best friend along. There's no limit to their community involvement, as long as it's connected through a small network of friends.

Jaclynn Robinson, 5:02

Jim Collison 0:00
I am Jim Collison, and welcome to The CliftonStrengths Podcast. On this podcast, we'll be covering topics such as wellbeing, teamwork, professional development and more. Now enjoy this episode.

Jim Collison 0:10
In this CliftonStrengths Podcast, we'll look at the Strengths Insight and Action Planning items from Appendix 1 in the Gallup book Wellbeing at Work one theme at a time, and today's theme is Relator. If you're listening live, love to have you join us in our chat room. We'll do questions after the fact right above me there on the live page. Or if you're listening after the fact -- many of you will, on the brand new CliftonStrengths podcast channel -- we ask you to send us our, your questions to us: coaching@gallup.com. Dr. Jaclynn Robinson is our host today. She works as a Gallup Learning and Development Consultant and was the primary contributor to Appendix 1 in the Wellbeing at Work book. And Jaclynn, always great to be with you. Welcome back!

Jaclynn Robinson 0:51
Hello, sir. Thank you.

What's the definition of Relator?

Jim Collison 0:53
Great to have you. Let's start with the definition of Relator. What is that?

Jaclynn Robinson 0:58
Let's do it. People that lead with the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.

Jim Collison 1:07
Yeah, I love that, I love that definition. And it just brings happiness to my face or to my, to my spirit at times, thinking about those. How does this, as we think about this theme, then, of Relator, how does it relate to you? And then, of course, how does it relate to others?

Jaclynn Robinson 1:22
How it relates to you: Your wellbeing cup is filled when you have opportunities to connect one-on-one or in smaller group settings with the people near and dear to you. How it relates to others: The authenticity and investment you put forth in relationships can draw people to you. Knowing they have a friend or colleague in you that seeks to see them for who they truly are fills their wellbeing cup.

Jim Collison 1:44
"For who they truly are," I think, is the key phrase in that. And I think for a lot of years, I was drawn to high Relators; didn't, didn't know this. But I was drawn to them because they took a genuine, true interest in who I was. I didn't, I didn't really understand that in my, you know, 20s. We didn't have this framework to work with. But that is definitely a draw, as we think about that best teammate, team member or that best manager that you've ever had, in drawing upon -- they don't have to have it to be a great manager. But Jaclynn, I'm always reminded of that draw, I always felt drawn to them, right. I always felt I could be open and transparent with them. I was spilling my guts, and I didn't know why. But it was Relator. Right?

Jaclynn Robinson 2:36
Yes. Because they really want to get to know you.

Jim Collison 2:38
Yeah. And it's a genuine --

Jaclynn Robinson 2:40
The good, the bad and the ugly. It's, yeah, it's genuine.

How does Relator look when it's thriving vs. struggling?

Jim Collison 2:43
Yeah. Tell me more about that. Could you, they were more interested in me talking about me than them talking about me or even them talking about them. And it was, it was always, it was always great. And very many significant moments in my life were influenced by Relators. It's just, it's just so significant. So we're spending time this season talking about wellbeing. Let's talk a little bit about Relator in the context of how does it, what does it look like when it's thriving, and then when it's struggling?

Jaclynn Robinson 3:13
Yeah, so thriving for a Relator is when you have an environment surrounded by people you like, appreciate and, I would say, enjoy. Whether it's, it's in your work life or your home life -- to you, relationships matter. And there's nothing better than partnering with a colleague you enjoy or connecting over dinner with loved ones. Struggling could be when you're in an environment where the intention is to mingle, yet you know no one in the room. So you might feel like a fish out of water as you attempt to make some small talk and find someone that shares some form of commonalities with you. Struggling can also be when you're in a workplace where there aren't strong work bonds. And it just feels like there's a lot of tension or conflict or just no one cares to get to know each other.

Jim Collison 3:58
I have a hard time relating to either one, because I have high Woo and high Relator. So if the room --

Jaclynn Robinson 4:05
Stand-alone theme; that's where we're going here.

Jim Collison 4:07
Any room, I can do it either way. Like, hey, I can either run the show, be the, you know, be the guy leading things and doing stuff and, you know, or I can find someone who needs somebody to talk to, and I can have conversations, go deep in those conversations. I never really understood that about myself until I took CliftonStrengths and started working through this. But yeah, it was the ability to work both, both angles. And I really enjoy deep conversations. I love just finding an individual and going super deep in that conversation. It's why I crave those kinds of relationships from time to time but also can do the Woo thing. So it's allowed me to do both. In the back of the book, in Appendix 1, we spend time looking at the 5 elements of wellbeing for this theme. You've picked one for us. Let's walk through it.

Jaclynn Robinson 4:57
I did. It's been a little bit since we've done community wellbeing, so that's what I chose. When coaching this person to get involved in a community, encourage them to bring a best friend along. There's no limit to their community involvement, as long as it's connected through a small network of friends.

Jim Collison 5:13
Oh, there, there might be a little secret superpower I'd never thought about, in terms of thinking -- so you naturally think, well, community, that's a lot of people. I don't know, like I -- bring a friend along. I've never really thought of that in the context of, how do high Relators who maybe do it or where large groups aren't their gig, bring a friend along. I hadn't, I hadn't really thought of -- that's a great, that's a great idea.

Jaclynn Robinson 5:41
Yeah, shared mission or purpose or family. I know some get involved in their church. And so maybe they'll do donut and coffee days on Sunday mornings, and they've got their, their family with them. Then you, of course, have that community network within your, your church, as one example, but just different ways of seeing that with Relators.

Jim Collison 5:58
I'm never afraid to go in any situation, whether it's big or small or whatever. So I don't, I didn't understand that. But wow, what great advice for high Relators that may, when they've got, when they have to do those kinds of things, to bring somebody along. And all the Relators are like, Yeah, duh, Jim! Move on to the next thing.

Jaclynn Robinson 6:17
I do a 5K with my best friend. What do you mean?

For those with Relator, how can it be used to support others?

Jim Collison 6:21
Right on. I love that. There are 4 other elements back there; a great resource that's available for you, if you, if you want to dig into that here, as we think about Relator -- available in Appendix 1 on, in the book Wellbeing at Work. Jaclynn, as we think about Relator, then, as we use it to support others -- and this may be another "Duh!" moment, but I think it makes sense. How can we use Relator to support others?

Jaclynn Robinson 6:45
Yes, if you're a manager or you're leading a team, you can get to know those on your team. You likely have an interest in their career aspirations and want to know more about who they are as a person, not just as a direct report. And this can make them feel seen and valued as a person. So that's going to support their sense of, I feel cared for in the workplace and give them that heightened sense of wellbeing. If you're on a team, you can drive performance by partnering with others on the team you get along with really well. So that genuine connection can lead to more idea generation and increased productivity and higher wellbeing. And then last, as an individual, you can seek out time with loved ones when you need an energy boost and wellbeing charge. Even a brief conversation or a meal with a family member or friend can be honestly just the recharge you need to get back out there in the world.

Jim Collison 7:35
Do you think a parent or manager who has low Relator can borrow that from, from their team if they don't have it? I think it's an important aspect.

Jaclynn Robinson 7:46
That's a good question.

Jim Collison 7:47
Do you think they can borrow that from the team?

Jaclynn Robinson 7:49
Yes. It's a good question -- going to those folks you know who have close bonds, to get a sense for the team dynamic or what the team's feeling or what the child is feeling, so that you have a better way to kind of circumvent whatever that situation is.

Jim Collison 8:04
Yeah, maybe have that superpower Relationship Building where they can sense those things as they're building relationships -- what those people need, what they, what they already have, what kind of conversations they need to have or whatever, and kind of borrowing that from the team -- or a child. You might have a child that has this in the family setting who could, who you can borrow that from. Just an idea, Relators, or those of you managing that don't have Relator -- a great opportunity to partner; a Power of 2 with somebody who can get that done. In Appendix 2, we have this framework that we've been working through -- great, great tool to use in your coaching or embedded coaches, if you're, you could be using this in your organization, it could be one of those 5 Coaching Conversations too. Walk us through that framework. Super simple. Jaclynn, walk us through that framework.

Jaclynn Robinson 8:53
You bet. I'm going right back to community here. So Ask Yourself: What is one community event or activity that I would enjoy getting involved in? Ask Your Team Members: What are some things we can do as a team to show our support for our communities? And Take Action: Serve as volunteers or board members for organizations that are important to your team. Again, you have this close connection as you're working together, and this could also be done on that personal level. So we could just take out, "Do this with your team," and say, "Do this with your, your best friends," when you start thinking about where you want to get involved in the community.

Jim Collison 9:28
I love this framework -- this Ask Yourself, Ask Your Team Members and then Take Action -- kind of always reminds me of this the Best of Me, right, you get the best of me when -- . And, and the other one is the I Bring, I Need, right. I, this is what I bring, and this is what I need. All of these, you know, as we think about this in the context of teams or even with yourself, you know, it just gives us, it just gives us this framework to remember a way to ask these questions as we go forward with this. So I'd encourage you to work, work through it. Jaclynn, any other thoughts on Relator as we kind of bring this in for a landing? Encourage, encourage the folks listening around this again -- any final thoughts?

Jaclynn Robinson 10:13
No. I think it's just that gut check, whenever you feel like you're, you're down and out, or you're busy, busy, busy. What I've noticed has been very helpful to Relators over the last couple of years is building in time, squeezing in time for that quick conversation or lunch or dinner with a colleague or a friend or family member. And that just minimal, you know, time that they're, that they're having with this individual has been enough to boost their mood and their spirits and get them back out there.

Jim Collison 10:44
Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of The CliftonStrengths Podcast. Make sure you like and subscribe wherever you listen, so you never miss an episode. And if you're really enjoying this podcast, please leave a review. This helps us promote strengths globally.

Jaclynn Robinson's Top 5 CliftonStrengths are Achiever, Strategic, Maximizer, Positivity and Relator.

Gallup^®, CliftonStrengths^® and each of the 34 CliftonStrengths theme names are trademarks of Gallup. Copyright © 2000 Gallup, Inc. All rights reserved.